Dad leaves kids, 3 and 5 alone with 7-yr-old in charge

This is a story my kids told me when I got them back from his visit. (Their dad takes them on a Saturday at 10 am and keeps them Saturday, Sunday, Monday and takes them to school Tuesday and I pick them up from school and daycare on Tuesdays.) 

Heba, now 7, told me that daddy had to go to work on Sunday and grandma couldn't watch them because she was at her home sick. Daddy left Heba in charge of her little sisters, age 3 and 5. This was October 20, 2009.

When they told me this on Tuesday, Heba told me she was scared because Noura ran away and she was afraid she wouldn't be able to get her back home. She told me that Daddy left her in charge because she is the oldest and she is a little momma and should take good care of them. That daddy had to leave and would be right back. Heba said she was scarred because it got dark and still he wasn't home.

The next weekend when he had visitation, I went to the Garden City Police station and told them that their dad left them alone and I just wanted them to go to his house and make sure there was an adult watching them. The police went to the door and the grandma answered the door. Of course Alaadeen and his mom were furious that the police came and they hit the kids and demanded to know who told their mom that Daddy left them alone in the home. 

The kids told me that he took each one of them alone to the bathroom and asked them. Mariam said that Daddy had a hammer in his hand and told her he  could kill her with the hammer if she did not tell him who said that. Then she said her dad got really mad and smacked her on the forehead with the hammer to show her that he was serious. When she told me this story on Tuesday, I could see a faint yellow bruise in the middle of her forehead and after therapy I took her straight to the emergency room for an examination.

The Garden City Police officer interviewed each of the kids individually and me.  Then he told me that the girls told them that their dad never left them alone and never hit them with a hammer. I said, "Of course they changed their word because their dad advised them never to tell on him. This is normal for kids to do that!" And the policeman said that he had been interviewing kids for many years and that he thinks my kids are telling the truth. But the kids did tell the triage nurses and the doctor that daddy hit them and left them alone.

A Wayne County Sheriff who was there told me that if I knowingly delivered the kids to their father for visitation and something bad happened to them, that I would be jailed for neglect because it is my duty to protect my children and I knowingly put them in a dangerous situation.

I explained to him that I had to let their dad have visitation because the court order, the divorce decree says he should have parenting time. The officer then told me to ignore the court order and keep the children away from him to keep them safe. He told me to go downtown to the Friend of the Court.

I went to the Friend of the Court and they put in my case number and said that the divorce decree and the judgement for child support were never entered into their system. They entered them that day because I had a copy of the judgement with me. Then they directed me to the Wayne County Circuit Court to file an emergency Motion to Change Parenting Time in order to stop his visitations. I did that. The clerk told me to save all of the supporting documents (evidence) to show the judge and she just took the original MTCPT.

I immediately sent a copy to Attorney Abbas via certified mail, as instructed by the court, and I put my personal home address on the documents since he already found out where I live.

Out of Control

Yesterday I went to the court for a change of custody hearing with my ex-husband, Alaadeen Alfoaady. He had an attornery, Mr. Abbas, and I had a free attorney provided by ACCESS.

The end result? His attorney said I made everything up because I was jealous that Alaadeen got remarried. My lawayer? He said nothing on my behalf! The result? The referee ruled against me, recommended resumption of Alaadeen's visits, and that I should pay $500. of Alaadeen's lawyer costs.

He never introduced all of the evidence against Alaadeen: Every time I get them back from his parental visits, the tell me horror stories:

KIDS' STORY: (1) After we exchanged the kids for his visit at the Dearborn Heights Police Station on Saturday, October 19, 2009 at 10 am, Dad wouldn't let them out of the car because he was following me the whole day (over 10 hours) in order to see where I live. After 10:30 pm when I returned home after visiting my friend, the kids said, they saw me park and go inside and he asked the kids, "Is this where you live?" And they said, "Yes!" and then he said, "Are you sure?" And they said, "Yes!" and then he took them to his home on Elmwood Street in Garden City.

The kids said that he had food in the car but wouldn't let them go to the bathroom or get out to play. When they asked him, "Why are you following our Mom?" He told them to shut up and smacked them. He kept hitting Noura (age 3) because she wouldn't stop crying. When I went to my friend's house, their dad asked, "Is this your house?" And they said, "No! That is Auntie ___'s house!" For that reason my friend is now in danger, because he wants to punish everyone who helps me.

Momma Houda

My children's dad told them to tell the therapist and their mom and everybody that their mom is not their real mom, their real mom is the new mom who lives with their dad and obeys him. Momma Houda is their real mom. That is the real mom, not the mom that ran away from him and broke his rules and broke up the family, and disobeys him.
 

Their dad told them to call me, ___ Dumb not ___ D___. And he told Heba, our oldest daughter, who is 7, that if she is bad with her mom and bad in school, that he will take her to Kmart and buy her anything she wants in the store.

He uses his kids to punish me because I left him, not because he loves his kids, he just uses them to hurt me. They are his only connection to me now, his only way to hurt me.

In Iraq, he would kill me, no penalty for him. Here we have laws to protect me, and this makes him crazy because in his tradition in his country, he can do whatever he wants to me and his kids. We are just his property and he can kill us and it doesn't matter. 

pregnant 13-year-old murdered by her parents

When I was a teenager in Iraq, about 13, a guy from Jordan came to Iraq to study college in Iraq because college is free in Iraq, they just have to rent a house. After 4 years they finish school and Jordan accepts the degree and they can return. One Jordan Dinar equals $4 USD. In Jordan, this education would cost the equilivant of one million dollars.

In Iraq, a girl of 13 in Middle School in my neighborhood, fell in love with a Jordanian who was studying there. He smooth-talked her into believing he would take her back to Jordan and marry her and they would have a great new life. She had sex with him and got pregnant. 


She tried to ask her friends to help her get an abortion but no one could help. So her family found out, and because this is a BIG shame on the family, they took her and bound her by her hands and feet and took her to a broken empty house and burned her to death, then put her in a grave. 


There was no funeral or family gathering to mourn her death. No body was allowed to acknowledge it. This was the way the family disposed of the shame she brought upon them. In Iraq this is not illegal and the government does nothing. 

I tell you this so that you understand the mentality of Iraqi people. When they come to America, they still have these beliefs and customs and mentality, and they have no regard for the laws here. They act on family honor and the dictates of guarding that honor, however outrageous we find that to be. It is normal to them.